7/16/98 By the Dashboard Lights

by Dave Friedli

By the Numbers

Fifteen years.

On a warm, but pleasant afternoon 15 years ago, Kathy and I said, "I

do".

Some grammarians would argue that WE said "WE do", but that wasn't a

line in our ceremony.

In the typical marriage rite, each person indicates that they

personally are making a life-long promise. It comes out as an "I"

thing.

Over time, the "I" thing has become a "we" thing.

Fifteen years equals 180 months. Months marked by paychecks and

bills and the passing of seasons. Months of rooms torn up in

remodeling, and months of scraping paint off the exterior of the big

white house on North Third Street.

Fifteen years equals 5475 days. Days spent working and playing and

raising children. Days spent at home and days spent away. Days of

illness. Days of exceeding health. Good days and not so good days.

Days of vacation. Days of being with the extended family to the

point of "I love my parents and brothers and sisters, but if I spend

one more day with them, I will go crazy!" Days of doing nothing.

Days of doing everything.

Days of helping each other through disappointment. Days of

celebrating the accomplishments.

Fifteen years equals 5475 nights. Nights of entertaining guests.

Nights of movies and rented videos. Nights of discussions in the

only private time away from children. Nights of being up with ill

children.

Nights spent together. Nights spent apart. Days apart are

difficult. Nights apart can become unbearable.

Fifteen years equals 131, 400 hours. Hours of housework and

yardwork and volunteer work. Hours on the road. "Hours of time on

the telephone line, talking 'bout things to come." Hours of working

through the conflicts (which have been amazingly few).

Hours in the car, traveling to doctor/dentist/orthodontic

appointments. Hours at school, following sports and music

activities.

Hours at the hospital, waiting for the birth of children and waiting

for recovery from surgery. Hours at church, especially holding to

the family commitment of an hour every Sunday morning

--perhaps two or three.

Fifteen years equals 7,884,000 minutes. Minutes of laughter.

Minutes of tears. Minutes--precious minutes--of time together in the

'magic of the moment' of doing what could be the mundane work of

living and growing together.

Fifteen years equals 473,040,000 seconds.

Since WE said "I do" on July 16, 1983, I have loved every second

with you, Kathy.

Happy Anniversary.