David Friedli

By the Dashboard Lights

April 17, 2008

In My Son’s Insteps

An iconic image of nearly every boy’s formative years is the family photo of him wearing his father’s shoes.

His feet are many sizes too small.

The photo doesn’t do justice to the clomp-clomp-clomping of the young lad half-shuffling, half-stepping across the floor.

Sonny boy isn’t walking far in these shoes, but at least in his imagination, he is going places. That place is in his future.

It’s a compliment, really.

What dad doesn’t want their son to follow in his footsteps?

Not to say that dads are perfect.

One hundred percent of moms out there know the truth.

We make lots of mistakes. But for the most part, we keep moving forward, half-shuffling, half-stepping through life.

Growing up is a process, and dads have their starts and stops too.

Sometimes we sprint. Sometimes we walk. Sometimes our life path takes us two steps back before we limp forward, desperately trying to get where we want to go.

All the while, our sons are watching.

Occasionally, they try on our shoes. Our offspring look ridiculous in those huge shoes. To think they could fill them, literally or figuratively, stretches the imagination.

Imagination met reality last week.

I needed to go to the garage on a quick errand. The sidewalk was wet. I looked at my stocking feet. I spied my son’s shoes.

“I’ll just half-slide my feet in them and shuffle out and back,” I thought.

I slipped my right toes in…and they fit. I maneuvered my other foot into the left shoe.

Here I am, 37 years senior to my son. I am standing in his shoes.

If you’ve put on someone else’s shoes—not just tried them on, but really worn them—you know they may be the right size, but they feel a little strange.

A well broken-in pair of shoes is molded to the wearer’s feet.

These shoes fit, but I felt the uniqueness within them.

I stood in the moment.

Each step to the garage brought a reminder of my life’s footsteps and where I have been. Some of those times I would be honored to have my son follow.

Other places, I hope he never goes.